Although I love shoes, handbags and the quest for the perfect pair of wide-legged trousers, politics is my first love and with primary season starting extremely early, I figured I’d put my two cents in on last week’s Republican debate in New Hampshire. Keep in mind I am not a professional, I do this for fun, and most of what I say is in jest. That being said, I am serious about politics and when neccesary, extremely blunt and opinionated.
Candidate 1–Mitt Romney, ex-governor of MA, noted for both being a Mormon and looking eerily like a Ken doll
I’ve been waffling back and forth on Romney (much like he does on certain issues…ooh, BURN). I WANT to like him. I feel like I need to like him. And sometimes I do. He’s an incredibly smart man, has a gorgeous family and could bring the all-too-liberal New England states into play for the GOP in ’08. But still…nothing he said impressed me. He looked bored standing there and instead of pointing out things that HE did during his tenure in office, he tried to shift the blame to Rudy during HIS tenure as mayor of NYC. He looks the part of President, sure…but maybe he should pull a Fred (Thompson) and try to play one on tv…
Candidate 2– John McCain, senator from the great state of Arizona, noted for being hated by both Republicans (immigration) and Democrats (Iraq)
I can’t say many bad things about McCain, unlike many others. Sure, he was WRONG about immigration, but so right on about Iraq. And I credit him for getting me interested in politics in 2000. But this debate was interesting for him because I think it reminded people that he IS still in this race. With all of the bad press his campaign had been getting, his strong showing helped tremendously. His answers were concise, well thought out…and damn, he LOOKED presidential. I do declare that the John McCain I loved 8 years ago is back.
Candidate 3–Sam Brownback, senator from Kansas, converted to Catholicism as an adult (cool), scary anti-abortion activist (not-so-cool)
Sam Brownback seems like a nice man. He converted to the Church as an adult, and that immediately gives him a few points in my book. Anyone who CHOOSES to be Catholic in this day and age as an ADULT, to me, seems very secure in their faith. I like that. But he also seems like he could moonlight as an abortion clinic bomber. I don’t like that. I don’t like abortion. I think it’s terrible that it exists. But it does. Unfortunately. And it doesn’t appear to be going anywhere. But this really isn’t the time or place for my thoughts on abortion. Just Brownback. And my thoughts are this. The man is BORING. Like horribly, watching paint dry, fishing on tv boring. I’ll be honest. His answers were times I took a bathroom break or a break for more diet coke. Since this whole president thing probably isn’t going to work out, maybe he could market a sleep aid device. Sam Brownback, talking for three hours about…well, it doesn’t really matter. As long as he’s talking, it’s bound to be boring.
Candidate 4– Duncan Hunter, Congressman from San Diego, hates illegals, loves fences and Gitmo
Oh, Duncan Hunter, not nearly as salty as Tancredo but not as crazy as Paul, but falls beautifully in the middle. While he didn’t have my favorite lines of the debate (those went to McCain, Huckabee and Giuliani respectively), but he was more entertaining than Brownback, which I suppose isn’t saying much. He hates illegal immigrants and wants to build a fence in six months. If you can get over his fence, he’ll get you a seat on the Olympic team. He also thinks the dining at the prison in Guantanimo Bay is superb and better than any prison in the mainland US. In all honesty, he really wasn’t that bad and some of his answers were pretty good. And unlike his usual disheveled appearance, he looked like he had his suit ironed for the occasion so he gets a gold star.
Candidate 5–Tom Tancredo, Congressman from Colorado, supportor of closed borders, supportor of building a big fence, and all around cranky-pants
Not much to say about Tancredo except that he hates illegals more than Duncan Hunter. Evidentally there are things he cares about other than immigration…what those things are, I don’t know. Maybe practiciing his “I’m-fed-up-with-all-of-you-people” snear that he had on the entire evening. From what I remember, he spoke a handful of times, but I couldn’t get over how ANGRY he looked. I propose he become a Border patrolman and stare down illegals running over the border. Way scarier than guns.
Candidate 6–Ron Paul, Congressman from Texas, doctor, libertarian-leaning Republican and certifible crazy person
Ron Paul. Where to begin. As a libertarian-leaning Republican, I was intrigued at first by this obscure congressman. He seemed to be everything I like–low taxes (!) and small government (!!). But he is dead wrong when it comes to foreign policy. He started out okay, saying the government was inefficent at keeping air travel safe. As someone who travels every week and is constantly running through airport, I agree with him. But then the crazy started to spew out, with his conspiracy theories and desire to get rid of government. And then the entire Iraq confrontation with Mike Huckabee. I giver Congressman Paul props for sticking up for what he believes in and not kowtowing to popular opinion, but I still think he’s crazy. I don’t think he’s a serious candidate, won’t get the nomination and is probably better suited to giving lectures in a crowded college lecture hall. Seriously, couldn’t you see this guy in a tweed suit with a bow tie and talking about government conspiracy theories?? I’d sit in that class!
Candidate 7– Rudy Giuliani, former Mayor of NYC, die-hard Yankee fan, crime-stopper and general badass
Okay, I should preface. I am a Giuliani girl. Big time. I love this man (I even love his fake tan). I love his corny jokes. I even love his seven thousand mentions of New York City during the course of a speech. But really, I think that he is the best. I’ve been hoping that he’d run since ’02 and not just because I think he handled himself really well during the wake of 9/11. But more on my love for all things Rudy at a later point. This is about the debate, where, I think, he did well. His line about Fred Thompson “playing his role on Law & Order” was kind of funny, but was definitely not as good as Huckabee’s “well, I turned down Leno!”. What I like about Rudy is that when he talks, people listen. He’s whip smart, explains things clearly and can actually relate how his tenure in NYC has made him ready for the Oval Office. One of the woman after the debate complained that all he did was talk about NYC, but I actually appreciated that. He showed results. Anyone who could take on New York and the mob during the ’90s and transform it into the the city it is now deserves mad amounts of credit. I think that showcasing his achievements as mayor IS a smart strategy–it shows that he can get results. His immigration policies trouble me a bit, but he did at least try to explain them. Seriously, I don’t mean this to be an all out “Rudy LoveFest”, but at least I’ll admit it is one.
Candidate 8–Mike Huckabee, former Arkansas Governor, wannabe rock star and part-time comedian
While I’m in love with Rudy, I’ll say I’m infatuated with Mike Huckabee. Easily the funniest candidate of the lot, Huckabee could be the second-tier candidate to break out. His beginning line of “I turned down Leno…” was good, though not as good as his “Congress spends more money than John Edwards in a beauty shop!”. He’s a good conservative and I think would be a great addidtion to any ticket. His tete-a-tete with Ron Paul, to me, showed that Huckabee isn’t just the funny candidate, but a serious one as well. Dr. Paul saying that the foreign policy had been “hijacked by a group of neoconservatives!” sounded more like a disgruntled liberal think tank employee than a US Congressman running for President, where Mike Huckabee using words like “honor”, “country”, “united”, seemed like someone that WAS running for President. Although I’m still an RG girl, I’m a BIG Huckabee fan…and not just so I can say “I Heart Huckabee”…although that is an added bonus.
Bottom-line, McCain and Huckabee were the big winners, Romney and “Scary” Tancredo the losers and Duncan Hunter gets a gold star for entertaining me with his thoughts on Gitmo and the fact he wore a suit that didn’t look like it had been worn on the plane FROM San Diego.